How do I love thee? Let me count the ways – Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Happily distracted from my chore
A chore I don’t enjoy is working out which bills need paying and offsetting these against income we actually have to pay them. It quickly becomes clear that the bills far outweigh the income so “Plan B” is quickly brought in. This involves working out which bills are more urgent and which can be delayed. I am easily distracted as Miss 7 year old walks into my room, climbs up onto my bed to make herself comfortable before she asks what I’m doing.
“I’m doing a jig saw puzzle – but some of the pieces are missing” I sigh.
“Oh.” MIss 7 year old looks a little perplexed as she pushes buttons on my calculator. Quickly, she changes the subject and I am happy for the change.
A lesson and change of perspective
She asks “Did you know it’s Valentine’s Day today?”
“Is it? No I don’t really pay attention to that stuff. I think it’s a load of rubbish!”
A sudden intake of breath from Miss 7 year old tells me she is shocked at my pessimism before she goes on to add “Valentine’s Day is very important!”
“Oh? and why’s that then?”
“Because it’s a day where you tell the very special people in your life that you love them.”
“You don’t need Valentine’s Day to do that. You can do that any day of the year.”
“Yes but in case you forget then Valentine’s Day is a reminder. It’s very important to tell people you love them.”
“Agreed.”
“So, I just came in here to tell you that – and to tell you that I love you.”
“Well that’s rather beautiful of you. And I love you too.”
She lands me a big, squashy bear hug that knocks my glasses crooked on my face. Bouncing off my bed, she walks out of my room, leaving me feeling as if I had just heard the last words of an epic poem as she calls, “Happy Valentine’s Day!”
“Happy Valentine’s Day, beautiful girl.”
And just like that, once again, the breath of fresh air that is she, completely changed my perspective. She contorted my very narrow view of what I had seen on TV, heard regurgitated over the radio confirming in my very un-romantic mind that Valentine’s Day was commercialism at it’s finest. Only there to cajole people into spending “ridiculous” amounts of money on long stemmed roses and hand made chocolates in a love-heart shaped box. The grumpy old woman in me says “Bah! Hogwash!”
She brought it back to the basics – of letting those special people in your life know how much they mean to you – and appreciation, even celebration of that! So many times in our everyday lives, things are done for us that go un-thanked and therefore appear to have gone un-noticed. We keep things in our hearts and forget to say a simple “thank you” or reciprocate an act of kindness.
Go on – you can do it
Go on…you can do it – dare to receive weird looks as you see your teen thinking “What’s up with Mum today?” as you acknowledge them for something they finally did (hey – don’t worry that you asked them to do it last month!).
Watch the worried look appear on your relaxed hubby’s face
as he’s about to finally settle in his big comfy chair to watch sports when you say, “Did I tell you that I think you’re amazing?” He’s thinking, “This is a set up! . Don’t fall for it! Don’t reply! She has another job lined up for you!” You really can have some fun with it. Eventually, if you do it enough – remember – baby steps – changes will come. Your genuine thanks will melt the weird and worried looks away like the snowman in summer.
So go on – if you aren’t doing it already, let the special people in your life know just how much you genuinely appreciate them and why. It will only cost a moment of your time. If we all did this more often – who knows? We may actually instigate world peace!!
Happy Valentines Day everyone!